Carrot Cake and Strawberry Shortcake
Status: Store-bought
Satisfaction: 7. On the dry side.
Associated with: Hansel and Gretel
Drawn-on carrots, for some reason, always kill me. Something about them seems plain wrong: it's as if the people making the cake want to remind you that a) there's a vegetable in your cake, which sounds gross, and b) that its presence probably makes it nominally healthier than your other cakes, but then that c) it's not really healthy for you, so d) we're going to draw on a fake carrot made out of pure sugar to make up for the fact that it's just a load of processed sweet stuff anyway, but at least it's almost like you're getting a real serving of vegetables. The association being that, if I was the wicked witch from Hansel and Gretel, I'd totally feed my children fake sugar carrots all the time. It seems like an appropriately perverse thing an evil witch would do.
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