Day 54: Preserved Egg Lean Meat Congee ("And It's Happy To See Ya!"

Preserved Egg Lean Meat Congee

Status: Restaurant (YVR--Vancouver Airport!)

Satisfaction: 10.

Associated with: Mulan

Yes, it was amazing. And yes, it was airport food. That is just so wrong, I know. But somehow Canada manages to make it right.

This scene from Mulan is one of my favorites.

Presenting the congee--

"And it's happy to see ya!"

and then...

"Get out of there, you gonna make somebody sick!"

Classic Eddie Murphy. By gosh, I miss the days when all he did was voice animated animals really, really well.

Day 53 (4-28-12): Boxed Lunch--Greek Salad and Eggplant Sandwich (or What Catbert Would Call An Antiquated Tradition)

Boxed Lunch: Greek Salad and Eggplant Sandwich

Status: Conference-provided--free food!

Satisfaction: 8. Loved the eggplant, the salad not so much.

Associated with: 

I love conferences.

Okay, I take that back. I love the conference (single) that I went to this weekend. Children's literature graduate student reference at University of British Columbia, to be precise. It was one of those moments where you realize, "By God, there are people like me in this world!" which is a pretty cool feeling in and of itself. And did I mention that even the food was pretty stellar? They fueled us all day with cookies, danishes, fruit tarts, and a good old dose of Canadian hospitality.

Since I didn't have anything particularly exciting to say about the lunch, though, I'll latch onto the setting--conference food and the office world? I think Dilbert would have a lot to say about that...for one thing, the corporation would definitely not be giving away free stuff. 'Nuff said.

Day 52 (4-27-12): Stir-Fried Veggies, Tofu, and Asian-Style Fried Chicken Over Rice (Thank Gawd Ah Don't Live in No South)

Stir-Fried Veggies, Tofu, and Asian-Style Fried Chicken Over Rice

Status: Restaurant (University of British Columbia's High-Class Food Mall--Sort of)

Satisfaction: 8. But I was so darn hungry, I'd have eaten anything.

Associated with: Princess and the Frog

I finished the whole damn thing, I was so hungry from the plane ride and a day without lunch. I haven't felt so accomplished since I went a 26.0 in my 50 fly. Okay, I didn't finish the fried chicken, which the Chinese lady at the food mall at UBC stuffed into my to-go box because apparently they were closing up shop and they thought it would be nice to have someone to give the leftovers to. Not that I didn't appreciate the gesture, but they gave it to the wrong person. Sorry, unfinished self-sacrificing chicken.

Anyway, as is probably already apparently, I couldn't stop thinking about the chicken. I haven't had fried chicken in years. Thank God I don't live in the South (hence the Princess and the Frog reference, by the way).

Day 51 (4-26-12): Cabbage with Filipino-Style Sweet Sauce

Cabbage with Filipino-Style Sweet Sauce

Status: Homemade

Satisfaction: 9.

Associated with:

The phrase "gluten free" scares me. So do big, burly German men, which I somehow associate with the combination of cabbage and (in this case, faux) meat--maybe it's the whole sauerkraut and cabbage thing they've got going in Germany. Either way, I found this remade cover of the very German Grimms' fairy tales online and just had to share. They speak the truth. Guten tag! (<--And doesn't that sound eerily like "gluten free"?)

Day 50: Okonomiyaki (Ucchan Style!)

Okonomiyaki

Status: Homemade

Satisfaction: 9.

Associated with: Ranma 1/2 (of course!)

I've been reading Ranma since I was 9, but I never tried making okonomiyaki until this year. Ukyo--otherwise known as "Ucchan"--is Ranma's second fiancee and makes a living cooking up mean okonomiyaki, a Japanese-style pancake with vegetables and an assortment of fillings. I'd never heard of it until I read Ranma, and somehow I spent the following decade-and-then-some drooling over this imagined version of what it would taste like when I finally got my hands on some. 


Needless to say, I won't be putting Ucchan out of business anytime soon--but considering that this dinner was totally Ranma-inspired and 13 years in the making...well, all I have to say is, 


Itadakimasu!

Day 49 (4-23-12): Stir-"Fried" Cabbage/Onions (Don't Feed It To The Cabbage Patch Kids)

Stir-"Fried" Cabbage/Onions

Status: Homemade

Satisfaction: 7.

Associated with: The recalled Cabbage Patch Kids Snacktime Doll

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQ5hIHqFIAM

Judging from the plethora of photoshopped devil-eyes I encountered when I searched "Cabbage Patch Kids Snacktime Doll," I think it's safe to say that I'm not the only one who found them creepy. The premise was that you could "feed" these dolls (see the video link for an extremely creepy commercial demo) and they would chew and gobble it right up (the food would pop out again in the conveniently-located backpack attached to them). I don't remember the doll I had actually "chewing"--yes, I was a proud owner of one of these as well--but alas, the dolls were recalled when apparently a number of little girls decided to feed their hair to the dolls and, well, you can probably figure the rest out.

At least I know my cabbage is still safe.

Day 48: Labana, Zaatar, Hummus, and Pita (Living Vicariously Through A Big Fat Greek Wedding)

Labana, Zaatar, Hummus, and Pita

Status: Restaurant (Aroma Cafe)

Satisfaction: 9.

Associated with: My Big Fat Greek Wedding

This almost feels like a cop-out, but I couldn't help it--having a pile of Greek food strewn in front of me really does remind me irresistibly of this classic movie. Granted, I wasn't a huge fan of it when I watched it way back when; but seeing as how one of my life's many goals is to either attend a Greek wedding or family-style feast at some point, I might consider reneging on that judgment.

Day 47: Gorgonzola Naan with Tamarind Sauce (can be Serious Monkey Business)

Gorgonzola Naan with Tamarind Sauce

Status: Naan = Store bought (Trader Joe's), Tamarind Sauce = Restaurant bought (Spice & Sweets)

Satisfaction: 9.

Associated with: Tamarin Monkeys

The only Indian food I eat is naan, and--picky as I can be--I will only eat it if served with yummy sweet tamarind sauce.

Incredibly cute monkey not included.

Day 46: Baked Mac and Cheese ("Cheddar--Whooo!")

Baked Mac and Cheese

Status: Roomie-made!

Satisfaction: 7.

Associated with: The Goofy Movie

Remember this guy? No, he wasn't guzzling rainbow meth (is that even edible?) in the movie, but he did ingested disgusting, revolting, and probably lethal doses of cheese whiz. If you stare at the photo long enough, you'll never think about cheese in the same way. It kind of sucks.

Day 45: Neopolitan Stack (is a French Man's Legacy)

Neopolitan Stack (Eggplant, Mushroom, and Veggie Sandwich)

Status: Deli-bought

Satisfaction: 7.

Associated with: 

"Four hostile newspapers are more to be feared than a thousand bayonets.”

-- Napoleon Bonaparte

For some reason that has never been explained--except by the fact that my parents learned English from people who used the words "pan," "pen," and "stereo" interchangeably--every time we got the vanilla-strawberry-chocolate ice cream from the store, we called it "Napoleon" ice cream. To this day, any time I order something with the word "Neopolitan" in it, I inevitably think of that inspiring French leader who conquered the world and offered his namesake to a brand of three-flavored ice creams.

Day 44: Tonkatsu Shoyu Ramen (Just Got Hadouken'd)

Tonkatsu Shoyu Ramen

Status: Restaurant (Yamadaya Ramen)

Satisfaction: 8.

Associated with: Ryu from Street Fighter

Remember this guy? I used to use him in Street Fighters just so I could mash the buttons and make him say my favorite phrase ever: Hadouken! He sounded like a bit like he was constipated every time he shouted it, but I still thought it was pretty cool. So when I come across Japanese words that share even a vague trace of these sounds (read: "Shoyu" = the "dou" from "Hadouken"?), I think of that word getting blasted to smithereens by a constipated man on steroids.

That's pretty epic ramen, if you ask me.

Day 43: Fruit and Nut Snack Pack (Denali's Singing For You!)

Fruit and Nut (Snack Pack Size)

Status: Store Bought

Satisfaction: 8. Hit the spot!

Associated with: Music of Denali Dinner Show (at Denali National Park, Alaska)

It's been probably a good year or so since I've had a "snack pack" of any kind, but dried/packaged foods like dried fruit and nuts always remind me of abstract concepts like the wilderness. Or nature. Or multiperspectivalism. Maybe not the last one so much.

When we visited Denali National Park a summer ago, we traveled with the Princess Cruise Line and ended up at this rather obscure company-run musical production/dinner show about the history of Denali. Rather cheesy photo aside, it turned out to be an excellent show, although I suspect that they really milk those actors for all they're worth (not only do they MC, sing, and dance--they also serve your food and drinks throughout the show). I don't normally tout corporate venues, but this one is a definite recommendation if any of you are ever in the Denali area and possibly traveling with the Princess crew.

Day 42 (4-15-12): Japanese Cheesy Croquette and Brown Curry (Not for Sensitive Eyes or Ears)

Japanese Cheesy Croquette and Brown Curry

Status: Restaurant (Yamadaya Ramen)

Satisfaction: 9. One point off for having absolutely nothing in the (otherwise delicious) curry.

Associated with: Stinkypoo.

***DISCLAIMER ALERT: Do not read if you have a sensitive mind! Or if the mention of gross things like moldy cheese, flies in your kitchen sink, or the profusion of excrement being flung around in Gulliver's Travels freak you out.***

As a rule of thumb, I don't eat curry. Since I was old enough to say the words "curry" and "poo" together, that's exactly what I've been saying--poo curry. I mean, you have to admit it. Just look at the picture, and then think about the word poop. True, right? Anyway, brown curry turns out to be the only kind I'll eat, which is unfortunate, because it also looks the most poo-like. I know, great bathroom humor.

Anyway, instead of posting a picture of poop (which would be Grade A disgusting) or doing the whole Gulliver's Travels thing (which would fit, but probably doesn't the solve the problem of you having lost your appetite for all things poo--I mean, curry--within the last 30 seconds), I decided to post cute poo pictures. So next time you eat curry, you'll just think how cute your poopish curry looks instead of just...poopish.

Day 41: Churro Waffle with Cinnamon Ice Cream (The Great Christmas in the Park Tradition)

Churro Waffle with Cinnamon Ice Cream

Status: Restaurant (Bru's Wiffles)

Satisfaction: 10.

Associated with: Christmas in the Park

They say it's a San Jose tradition, but "Christmas in the Park" is really my family's tradition. Every year, the city of San Jose hosts this great event where they close off two blocks in downtown and schools, organizations, and individuals come out to decorate trees like these. Then they set up these archaic-looking animatronic booths that do things like sing Christmas carols in a steely GPS-type voice and look like they've been pulled out of a bad sci-fi film, and everybody walks around and looks at them and sort of smiles and enjoys the cheesy show and everyone else's company. They also set up this booth where you can throw coins at a (fake) reindeer's mouth, and if your coin goes in, it'll ding and say "Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas!" My mom always brings literally a couple pounds' worth of pennies, and we throw pennies for half an hour until our arms get sore and people just stand there cheering us on, which explains both why we own this tradition and how little we care about being the corniest (read--cool) family in the city.

Anyway, every year at this event my parents will buy my brother and me churros like we've five years old again, and we'll stand there with our churros and our bag full of pennies and be the jovialist--that's not a word, but what am I studying in an English doctoral program if I can't make up words?--bunch in town.

Day 40 (4-13-12): Instant Ramen with Onions and Lettuce (The Forbidden Fruit)

Instant Ramen with Onions and Lettuce

Status: Home...prepared?

Satisfaction: 8.

Associated with: Pokemon TV Show

When I was younger, my mom had this incredible list of things that we (my brother and me) were "allergic" to. It's one of the main reasons I've always attributed her with an inexhaustible imagination: according to her, we were allergic to (in no particular order) grass, chocolate, shellfish, candy, and MSG, just to name a few. Of course, this meant that Halloween every year was a hellish experience--on those blessed years when my mom felt that it would okay to risk the potentially fatal effects of eating the candy we collected, we might be able to keep up to two or three pieces of the loot--and there was a significant dearth of one of my favorite childhood, MSG-laden foods: instant ramen. 

Naturally, after my brother and I grew a little older and began questioning my mom's authority to determine exactly what we were "allergic" to, we tried to get as much of the aforementioned rations as we could. This included wheedling our babysitter into allowing us to have instant ramen whenever she was feeling in a generous mood, and I have forever associated her house as a free space in which ramen and Pokemon--my favorite show of all time, next to Sailor Moon--were, praise the gods, allowed. (The other "forbidden" item in our household was the television--I'm pretty sure we were told we were allergic to that at some point in our childhoods, too.) The bottom picture is an accurate representation of what I looked like for probably the first ten ramen/candy/TV-deprived years of my life, before I wised up and evolved (pardon the pun) into the mean, lean snarfling sweets machine I am today.

Day 39: Bolani and Assorted Dips (All You Harvest Moon Players Know What I'm Talking About)

Bolani and Assorted Dips

Status: Farmer's Market

Satisfaction: 10.

Associated with: Harvest Moon

I have a fatal obsession with this game. For those of you who haven't played it before and are thinking to yourselves, "It looks like a game where you'd freakin' farm all day or something"--you have no idea how right you are. And what's more, you have no way of possibly imagining just how addicting it can be to water corn and milk cows all day. So let me tell you: it's super addicting. Deathly addicting, really.

I also love farmer's markets. Okay, so I realize that the vendors at farmer's markets don't necessarily sit around all day sowing little tomato seeds and picking apples and stuff (my friend and I make it a weekly thing to buy from our regulars--the bolani man or the pita yogurt man), but let me have my romantic visions and I won't ask about yours. And really, who cares what I'm thinking as long as I'm supporting local farming and food, right?

(PS this is probably the first time in my life I've ever become a "regular" anywhere. So in addition to feeling like I'm rallying behind all my farmer folks and whatnot, I also feel like I'm in a really cheesy Hollywood film. Needless to say, it's kind of a nice feeling.)

Day 38: Belgian Waffle ("I'm Makin' 'Em!")

Belgian Waffle with Maple Syrup

Status: Restaurant (Waffle Chix)

Satisfaction: 10. Surprisingly and amazingly delicious. I would go back for seconds. Maybe thirds.

Associated with: Shrek

If you don't recognize this scene or if, upon hearing the words Donkey and waffle in the same sentence, the words "I'm making waffles!" don't immediately pop into your head in Eddie Murphy's signature sassy voice, then you just need to go. Go, watch Shrek, and then come back and read this again.

If you watch it and still don't understand this reference, sorry--there really was no hope for you to begin with.

Day 37 (4.10.12): Marinated Eggplant (Got Me into Grad School)

Marinated Eggplant

Status: Homemade

Satisfaction: 7.

Associated with: Stuart Little, by E.B. White

My thesis advisor and I share an obsession for eggplant that I will forever associate with my work for her class, which was--for better or for worse--a Lacanian reading of Stuart Little. I will also forever associate eggplant and our epic meal at Pasta Bene in Berkeley with her adorable dog Gracie, but considering the fact that most of the work I'm currently doing in children's literature stems from her very idiosyncratic class, I feel even more indebted to eggplant now (or at least my associations of it) than I did before I took her class.

Day 36 (3.9.12): Filipino Spaghetti (Meets Mulan)

Filipino Spaghetti

Status: Homemade.

Satisfaction: 10. I've been craving this since I had it for the first time two summers ago in San Diego!

Associated with: Mulan

I assure you that whatever the Chinese poets imagined Mulan to look like in the days of yore, this was probably not it. Ahh, the things fusion will do when culture meets culture and adapts! And just as Mulan was never meant to be a Disney princess (she's not! Disney says she is, though, according to their princesses website), spaghetti noodles were probably never meant to collide with the sweet, tangy, and sinfully delicious combination of (soy) meats in this Filipino dish.

Day 35: Vegetable Fajitas (Imagine Anthropomorphizing Them--Scary, Right?)

Vegetable Fajitas

Status: Restaurant (Taberna Mexican)

Status: 7. Not amazing, but not bad, either.

Associated with: Veggie Tales (the obvious, you-all-saw-this-coming-cop-out choice)

It's really not such a cop-out choice if you think about it. I mean, the colors on my plate do sort of match the Veggie Tales crew (pictured above) with an insane amount of demographic accuracy. I have never watched an episode of anthropomorphic mutant legumes--I mean, Veggie Tales, in my life, and I don't know if I ever plan on doing that. It might be one of things that I'm just better off not watching. You know. Sort of like Teletubbies.

Day 34 (4.6.12): Chinese-Style Tofu with Ground Beef (Animal Parts in Food--It's An Asian/Chinese Thing)

Tofu w/Ground Beef

Status: Made by auntie

Satisfaction: 9.

Associated with: American Born Chinese, by Gene Yang

It always amazes me how Chinese traditions can always manage to insist on certain things that don't make sense: for example (and this is the showcased example of the day), putting some form of dead animal into dishes that would be perfectly vegetarian-friendly without it. Not that the result doesn't usually end up being delicious anyway; but just know that if you're going to step into a traditional Chinese restaurant and order the tofu or eggplant thinking it's going to be a nice environmentalist gesture, you might want to ask a waiter about it first (and probably get a supercilious eyebrow waggled at you before you get an answer). Jin, the protagonist of Gene Yang's ingenious graphic novel ABC, gets this point down pat, although the whole animal rights part doesn't quite make it in there.

Day 33 (4.5.12): Edible Food Festival at UCLA

It was amazing. It was everything I have been working towards with this blog in bringing two of my favorite things in the whole wide world--food and literature--together. And most of all, it was delicious.

This year was UCLA's 4th annual Edible Book Festival. Well, and what in holy tarnations is an Edible Book Festival? you ask. As my most reliable online source Wikipedia informs me, the International Edible Book Festival--also known as Edible Book Day--happens every year around April 1st. On this momentous day, organizations and institutions around the globe open their doors and pages to all types of food (cakes, candies, caramels--you get the point) that are dedicated to a book of the creator's choosing. Then, people congregate to peruse these literary creations, so to speak, while panels of judges file in for both visual and literal taste-tests of the entries. And then, of course, after all of the formal proceedings are over, there's--you guessed it--

A whole lot of eating. 

When I heard about the festival happening at UCLA's library, I knew I had to enter. The result of two days of working with fickle fondant, messy frostings, and unbelievably uncooperative cakes was what you saw from the previous post. I guess it all worked out in the end, though, because the festival was a complete and total success.

Take a look at just a few of my favorite entries:

The story of the Wyfe of Bath (appropriately spelled in Middle English) by my friend Christina.

21 Balloons (Won Best Tasting)

The Edible Garden (that was a crap ton of cupcakes! Won Best Student Entry)

The Rainbow Fish (won People's Choice)

The Lorax (my personal favorite--I love the illustration here!)

Part II of the Lorax

Of course, The Hunger Games found its way into the festival.

And lastly, don't forget the sly cat in the corner (won Most Creative--along with a brand new Edible Books apron and a $50 gift card!)

The judges coming down the long row of entries. All in all, it was an exhilarating experience being able to bring my own work out to a large crowd, watch everybody taking pictures and admiring everyone else's work, talking to other people about their food-making experience, and explaining all of the fun I had with my own cake to voyeurs, judges, and the Bruin reporters. The only thing I have to say is that I seriously hope nobody got diabetes after this event--it might be a good thing that it only comes once a year after all.